You can easily recognize happy connections between people. They care about each other, support, love, and prove it with their actions every single day. However, there are other types of relationships when you do not know what to expect. A constant feeling of tension and pressure is what partners experience. Just take a moment to imagine such a situation. You are getting ready for a date with your significant other, you both feel well, and all of sudden a romantic atmosphere is changed into a cold one. Is any of you playing mind games in relationships? What are they actually? Keep reading to find out more examples of mind games in relationships, their crucial signs, and the ways to cope with them.
Mind Games Meaning in Relationships
First of all, let’s start with the meaning of mind games in relationships. It is a certain type of tactic that people use in order to manipulate their partners, show their control, and make them act as they want. Such behavior has nothing in common with healthy dating or relationships. Moreover, this is a handy option to go far from taking responsibility for any actions and feelings. Luckily, you can recognize this issue and understand that you deal exactly with it right now. Knowing signs of mind games people play in relationships will let you make the right conclusions and decide on your future behavior.
Signs of Playing Mind Games in Relationships
If you hesitate about whether your partner is playing mind games in a relationship or not, then these signs will help you clarify everything at last.
1. You start doubting about yourself
It is one of the major signs that your partner is playing mind games with you. As a result, you start doubting whether you can make certain decisions. You lose self-confidence even if at first you do not notice it. Moreover, you are not ready to share everything openly as you are not sure that your significant other will like or accept it.
2. You are always guilty
Aside from worsening your self-esteem, people who play mind games may also blame you for everything. It happens even if you are not guilty. At the same time, this person pretends to be perfect in every way. Therefore, you always feel guilty, and your opinion doesn’t matter at all.
3. You are confused all the time
The worst thing that may happen in any relationship is hesitation about a partner’s feelings and attitude. They make you wonder whether you are loved actually. This state of uncertainty may kill you at the emotional level. In this case, a partner may be too cold or too warm throughout the day. One minute you can feel passion and love, and in a moment – indifference.
4. You are compared with other people
It is terrible when the person you love constantly compares you with other people. At such moments you may feel disappointed and down. Comparisons that are made without any reason are a direct way to ruin the closeness that has been recently between you two. They are even worse if the partner compares you with their ex.
5. You regularly feel jealous
Another sign of mind games in relationships is attempts of your partner to make you feel jealous. This may be demonstrated in many ways. For example, your beloved is flirting with other people just in front of you. Or, it may occur in the form of comments under the posts on social networks. It is possible to mention even more similar examples, but the idea is all the same. A partner who acts like this has really strange intentions towards you.
6. You always call and come first
Playing hot and cold is another sign of mind games in relationships. It means the partner always makes you come, call and text first. You have to take initiative all the time and even do not hope to receive a message from your beloved. Simply put, this is only you who worry about the relationship, and try to make them work out.
7. They try to hurt you intentionally
It may sound strange, but some people are really into making others feel bad. Therefore, if your partner constantly tries to hurt your feelings intentionally, then you may take it as another sign of mind games. Negative or even rude comments among your friends and relatives are not surely okay for people who appreciate each other and do not want to make a partner feel awkward.
8. You are weak
What is mind games in relationships? It’s when you feel weak. Your partner does everything in order to feel a winner. They may even have certain problems, and instead of looking for a solution, they project all difficulties on you.
9. Partner wants something
What will you do if you need something? Any normal person perhaps would come and ask the partner for a definite thing, but not the one who is engaged in mind games. Instead of telling them directly what they want, they plan to get it thanks to different manipulative acts. For example, your partner may make you feel discomfort while you are caring about other people instead of saying that actually they need the same from you.
Why Do Some People Play Mind Games with Their Partners?
The reasons for playing mind games in a relationship may be different. However, the goal is all the same – get power over the partner. Among the most common causes are:
- Manipulation. By playing mind games, people want to reach their goals while manipulating their partners. They take advantage of all options: sex, money, friends, attention, etc.
- Control. It is one of the main goals of mind games. The person does their best to control your steps and feelings. Such people are willing to command others and get real satisfaction in return.
- Proving importance. People who are engaged in mind games, want to show their significance and confirm that they are essential to you. As a result, you hurry to ask for attention and care.
What to Do with Women and Men who Play Mind Games in Relationships
Did you find yourself being involved in mind games in relationships? Breathe with relief as it is quite a common issue nowadays. If you decide to fight for your love, then you are recommended to pay attention to a few important tips:
- Plan a conversation with your significant other to clarify the issue. Explain how their actions impact you, and how you feel in the long run. It would be great to mention a few detailed examples of mind games in relationships to explain everything clearly enough.
- Say that you are ready to apologize. But do not hurry up and make sure your partner really wants to save your relationship. Get ready to wait for some time as real changes never take place over a single night.
- Make a final decision. Is your partner ready to take responsibility? Great. Otherwise, you should decide on what to do next. Actually, you have only two options: accept the following behavior or leave forever.
Mind games in relationships are not the best issue that you may face in your life. They may make you feel unimportant, unlucky, and sad. With a list of signs and tips on how to behave in such a situation, you can work out a suitable solution for yourself. Just keep in mind that a relationship should make you feel happy, and filled. So, remember to keep your own emotional state as the greatest priority all the time.
Dennis Farley began his career as a dating coach after earning his degree in Pshycology from University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA). He quickly realized that many people struggled with dating and relationships, and that there was a need for clear, practical advice that could help people find love and happiness.
I understand what you are talking about. My current girlfriend always compares me with her ex. I am always worse, slower, and less successful. One minute she says that she wants to spend all her life with me and in an hour she regrets meeting me at all. I feel so puzzled, Now, when I read your article, I decided to talk to her honestly and put an end to this staff forever.